This weekend was supposed to be our family vacation. School starts Monday for our boys. I work at a pool in the summer, and the school district there started Wednesday. Combine those factors with the fact that August is always slow at the pool, and the formula is complete for a weekend to go away.
Our plan had been to go to Maine to see the Blue Angels at Brunswick, ME, and stay with dear friends in Topsham. Unfortunately, the stars did not align; they had to take their daughter's things to school, so we decided to have our first-ever Staycation. Giving our son, Henry, parameters, he made a chart with weather forecast, planned activities for each day, and an alternate activity, too. Hurricane Irene made an appearance on the eastern seaboard, which led to Plan B each day, but so far not due to severe weather, just some clouds and sprinkles.
Yesterday, we did get to go on our planned hike at Hawk Mountain. The climb up started out fairly flat and easy, with lookout points requiring a little rock scrabbling. Fun, easy, and we enjoyed each others company--and the chipmunks that showed up at each lookout point. Rather suddenly, the path got rocky and rough, but before too long we summited and took in the panorama. It was absolutely breathtaking! Sky with hazy clouds, trees swaying gently in the breeze, green fields, railroad tracks and a few houses below......I could have stayed for hours.
After a few minutes, probably 15 or so, my husband and Henry were ready to go, Joseph asked if he could just take a nap, and even Drew was ready to move on. I chuckled, as awed by the differences in all of us as I was by the view. Differences that not only make us who we are, but also help our tolerance to grow, help us to appreciate one another, and make our lives more interesting. I knew that it was quite possible that my desire to just sit on a rock may very well have been greatly indulged by my guys, so with a last look, and a simple "already?" I climbed up off my rock to head back to the trail.
On the way down, other pink-faced people were heading up--looking, I'm sure, very much like we did not long before. Henry joked about his disappointment at not seeing any hawks or eagles, and I feigned exasperation at his lack of patience. As I was thinking about how sweet my "city boy" husband is, and how fun it is to do outdoorsy things with him, we passed the benches provided very near the point where the trail changes from smooth to rocky. Sitting alone was a woman, perhaps mid-60s. The boys, ahead of us, politely ceased their chatter. That's when Guy spoke.
"Are you doing okay?" he asked. Such a simple question, but one that completely blew me away. The woman's face softened, and she replied, "I'm fine. I'm just waiting for my husband. Thank you." It's one of those things that always catches me off guard, yet it's one of the things that made me fall in love with him in the first place. Guy has a way of picking up on the needs of strangers, and addressing them in a way that puts them at ease. The question he asked is one that I could certainly have asked, but never occurred to me until he asked it. As life has gotten crazy with jobs, kids, dogs, bills, we don't get to spend the same kind of time together as we did when we were dating or newly married, so moments like this are so very necessary to our marriage, our relationship, our love. In that half a moment, I fell in love with him yet again. No, it wasn't the falling off a cliff in love feeling I had back in the early 90's, but I still recognized it in that bit of breathlessness, that "ah!" in my heart, and especially in the way my eyes were affected.
When I think about the things that are our love, I can feel my eyes soften on the edges. I imagine it's the "soft focus" of real life. When I concentrate on that feeling, I realize that my neck and shoulders also soften, relax a bit, become a little less tight, and my heart opens. That's when I remember the cliff-falling, ultra-intense, uncontrolled explosion of feelings from all those years ago. Those small moments feed the fire. It's still there, although having become familiar with it, I sometimes take it for granted. Searching for those small moments, and recognizing them when they present themselves, is such a beautiful exercise! I love falling in love again, unexpectedly. I wonder where the next one will be.....
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